Soul Eater episode 5: What If?
by mr. 96
Summary: What if Kid joined the fight in episode 5? A rewrite of the fight scene in episode 5 the way I wanted it! A one-shot.


"Come on, Kid!" Liz was getting annoyed. "Don't you want to save them?"

"I'd love to, but I don't think I can," Kid said, crying on the floor. "If I fail at organizing my toilet paper, I'll fail miserably at a rescue attempt!"

Liz sighed. "Patty?" she said, "It's your turn."

Patty giggled intensely. She ran up to Kid and whispered something in his ear. Kid's eyes widened. "You what? No, wait, you can't do that!" Patty laughed. "But if you go rescue them, I'll keep my mouth shut about it!" she said.

"Damn you, Patty…" Kid grumbled, "You had to go and mention what happened to us last night!"

"Okay, Patty. _What _happened last night?" Liz asked. Patty smiled. "Lemme put it this way: You're _beneath_ Kid, but I rise to the _top."_ Liz groaned. She guessed that it had to happen, since she and Patty lived in the same house as the biggest heartthrob in Death City, but she really, _really _wished it didn't.

"Come on, guys, let's go!" Kid shouted, suddenly regaining his courage. Liz sighed. Living with Kid was a real piece of work….

"What's the matter with you, Maka?" Soul said, "Why are you just sitting there? Get up!"

"Shut up!" Maka cried, slapping Soul's hand away, "You wouldn't be acting so tough if you could see the shape of his soul like I can?"

Soul growled. "You're wrong!" he shouted, "I wouldn't care, Maka! All you saw was a single soul, right? You didn't see your future!" He grabbed her and shook her. "You can't give up before you even fight! You're supposed to turn me into the strongest Death Scythe ever! You don't want that worthless father of yours to outshine us, do you?"

"That's exactly the kind of sentiment I wanted to hear!" a voice called from above. "You should listen to your scythe!" Soul, Maka, and Stein all turned their heads. A young boy was standing there with black hair and white stripes on one side. "Oh?" Stein said, turning his screw, "And who might you be?"

The boy smirked. "Death the Kid, son of Shinigami-sama, and student at Death Weapon Meister Academy as of just recently!" He scratched his hair. "To tell you the truth, I don't really need to take your remedial class, but I like to go for extra credit. It makes my grade point average perfectly symmetrical."

Stein looked at him. "Oh, I see," he said, "You're the type of Meister who likes to exert absolute control over his environment. If anything goes against your way, you lose control. It might seem hard for someone like that to resonate with anyone, but the domineering aspect of your personality makes it possible."

Kid's smile melted away. "Well, then, if you can tell that much about me, then you probably know that the screw in your head drives me crazy!"

Stein grinned. "Yes, yes, I knew that," he said, "I also know that my stitches aren't helping much either, are they?"

An enraged Kid screamed and shot numerous times at Stein. The latter smirked and took the shots, not even hurt. "Guns that fire the Meister's soul wavelength, compressed and amplified? Interesting, worth experimenting on, but you're forgetting I'm the ultimate Meister—resonance doesn't work against me." Kid smashed the back of Liz against Stein's face and kicked him in the stomach, then back flipped and kicked Stein in the chin. Maka watched. "I can't compete with them….I just can't!" she said. "Look at them, Maka," Soul replied, "That guy's helping you out. He's taking on Stein so you can recover."

Kid jumped back. "That's not all that's happening," he said, "Haven't you noticed? Stein hasn't been attacking you at all." "Yeah," Soul said, "He's been waiting patiently for you to finish this temper tantrum. Isn't that so polite of the good doctor Stein?" Maka smiled and stood up. "Sorry about that. I'm better now," she said.

"No problem. Come on," Soul replied, "If we die, we die cool. You've got my support, and that guy's too. We're all here for ya." He turned into a scythe, which Maka grabbed.

Kid looked at her. "If you're going to do this, let me give you some advice," he said. "To achieve Soul Resonance the right way, the two of you have to be focused on the same goal. Whether it's because the two of you are united in thought, or because one of you gives complete control to the other, your 'partner' has to do everything exactly as you wanted."

"Dude, you didn't need to say that," Soul said, "I'm prepared to die for my Meister!"

"Then you probably don't need my help. I'll give you the first blow." Kid sighed.

Maka nodded. "Let's go, _Soul Resonance!"_ she and Soul shouted, their souls linking together. "Witch-Hunt Slash!" She fired the Witch Hunter at Stein. "I'm surprised you can manage that technique at such a young age," Stein said, catching it and sliding back a little. "Even I had to practice years with your father before I could pull that off!" Maka struggled. He was fighting back! She had to find a way to break through, she _would, _she _will!_ "You may have a rather large soul," Kid smiled, "But with Soul Resonance, 1 plus 1 can equal three or even four, preferably eight!" Tsubaki and Sid sweat-dropped. What was he talking about? "I'm saying that several souls can unite to create something greater than a single soul!" Kid explained. "Soul Resonance: Twin Death Cannon!" His twin guns turned into skull-like cannons around his arms. _"Resonance stable," _Liz said, _"Completed in 3…2…1…" "Ready to fire!"_ Patty shouted, giving two fingers up. Kid fired, his blast combining with the Witch-Hunt Slash. Stein struggled to contain it, trying his best to keep his balance. Finally, he couldn't take any more, and was knocked down. Unfortunately, this effort had left Maka tired, and she fell down. "Maka!" Soul cried. "Wake up! If you don't, he's gonna get back up!"

Stein started to stand up. "That was pretty good. But I gather that was your last shot." He moved toward Maka. "And now, let me finish the job," he said. Soul changed back. "Don't make a move toward my Meister!" he shouted. "Okay, then," Stein said, smiling, "I'll start with you." He patted Soul on the head. "Congratulations. You passed." Soul looked at him with a confused expression on his face. "Whaaat?" he said, dumbfounded. "Not only did you beat me, but you also protected your Meister. That's an A+ in my book." Stein explained. "Let me ask my question again: Whaaat?" Soul asked. "Lord Death asked me to give you a remedial assignment," Stein explained, "you were never in any real danger." "But…what about Black*Star?" Soul shouted. "You freaking killed him!"

"Hyaa-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!" BlackStar said, waking up from Tsubaki's lap. "You say the funniest stuff, you know that, Soul?"

"But—but what about Sid being a zombie?" Soul said, whirling around.

"Sorry, guys," Sid said, "Back when I was alive, I never would have told a lie, but since I've become a zombie, things have changed."

"Wait…." Maka said.

"….Does that mean…" Tsubaki said.

"...THIS WAS ALL A TEST?" everyone finished.

"Us getting scared and beat nearly to death was all part of a lesson?" Maka shouted, flustered.

"But you are stronger thanks to this lesson!" Lord Death smiled under his mask.

"You mean I came here for nothing? I've put something unimportant above the symmetry of my toilet paper! Liz, Patty, we've got to go back!" Kid cried.

"You do realize, Kid, that I snipped the tip of your right lapel when I attacked you?" Stein said.

Kid stopped. "Wait…what?" he said, "No! It can't be!" Liz sighed, changing back. "It isn't, Kid," she said, "Look! You're fine!"

"Anyway, it was fun scaring you kids. You should have seen the look on your faces!" Stein laughed, cleaning his glasses.

Everyone froze at that. Thoughts like _You mean the creepiness wasn't an act? This guy's nuts! He really is sadistic! _Passed through the minds of everyone there.

"Noooo!" Kid cried, "I can't take it any more! I've got to go back and check my toilet paper!"

Maka and Soul looked at him. Was there something wrong with him…?

"Oh, you don't have to worry about that," Stein smiled, "You must be tired, right? Why don't you all stay at my place?"

"HELL NO!" everyone cried.

Walking back, Kid turned back. "Wait. I didn't catch your names, did I?" he said, turning to his new friends.

"I'm Scythemeister Maka," Maka waved.

"Maka? Surely you're the daughter that my father's Death Scythe is always talking about?" Kid asked.

Maka became annoyed at this. "I really wish you wouldn't bring him up," she said.

"Yahoo! I'm Black*Star!" BlackStar shouted. "And I'm going to surpass God someday!"

"Hi, I'm Tsubaki," Tsubaki waved, "Very pleased to meet you."

Soul smirked. "And I'm Soul Evans. The next Death Scythe. That means I'm going to be your weapon some day!" he said. "You're even cooler than your dad. I'm looking forward to it."

Kid smiled. "Sorry, Soul, but I'd rather make my own weapon by myself. That way I can make it perfectly symmetrical. Besides, you're nowhere near symmetrical at all."

Maka became angry at this. "Someday, I'm going to create the greatest Death Scythe ever!" she said, "And I hope that you're grateful for it!"

Kid smiled at this. "All right, Maka," he said, "Try not to disappoint me. Soul has to be absolutely perfect if he can't be a symmetrical weapon."

He waved goodbye. "Anyway, it was nice meeting all of you," he called.

Maka smiled. This year was probably going to get more and more interesting at every second.


End file.
